


Katniss' First Christmas

by okayhotshot



Category: Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: Christmas, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-22
Updated: 2013-12-22
Packaged: 2018-01-05 12:00:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1093645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/okayhotshot/pseuds/okayhotshot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Katniss celebrates her first Christmas with Peeta after the Rebellion.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Katniss' First Christmas

**Author's Note:**

> This isn't my best work but I wrote it for Fic Exchange so I really hope that the person who requested this likes it!

 We never celebrated holidays in the Seam. They were too expensive, involved too much money that we didn't have. Money for extra food, money for presents, money, money that we would never be able to earn, no matter how much extra game I could catch. I always hated it for Prim the most because I knew that some of her friends were merchant kids and they celebrated things like Christmas where their parents and family bought them gifts and she didn't have anyone to do that for her. One year I tried my best to scavenge something up for her and I managed to get enough extra game to trade for a collar for Lady. It wasn't much, but it was something and I swear, the smile I got that Christmas morning is the one that gets me through the hardest days. It gets me through the days that I miss her the most.

I try to push all thoughts of Prim from my mind as I watch Peeta setting up a tree in what is now our living room. He unofficially moved in in late July after he returned to Twelve in April. It seemed fitting because he was already over here all the time anyway, sharing my bed, holding me in his arms to protect me from the nightmares and comforting me with his lips. It didn't take as long as I thought for Peeta and I to form the loose bonds of a relationship. We shared our first kiss since he came back merely weeks after he came back. I took him to the meadow to watch the sunset after a particularly bad attack and as the sky faded to oranges, pinks and blacks, his lips enveloped mine and I felt for the first time since the war ended that maybe things could be good again. Our relationship has only grown since then, solidified more. In early August, Peeta and I made love for the first time and I was finally able to admit to him that I loved him. It felt so good to have it out in the open. I felt liberated and free and not long after, we decided to have our toasting. By District Twelve standards, we're officially married. This isn't to say that everything with us is perfect, it's far from perfect. There are still days that Peeta has to grip the back of chair, the counter, the frame of a door until his knuckles turn white until he remembers who he is. We still play Real or Not Real on daily basis when Peeta can't remember a detail or needs a refresher on something. There are still days that I refuse to deal with anything and don't budge from the bed and wallow in my misery. There are days that my demons not only haunt me at night but during the day in the form of flashbacks. The slightest thing can trigger them. A word, shooting an arrow, just walking past Prim's door.

“Done!” Peeta's voice pulls me from my thoughts and I see him simply beaming at the Christmas tree that's now nearly towering to the ceiling of our living room. Peeta insisted that we celebrate Christmas this year. He said it would be nice to celebrate something that is supposed to be happy. He's convinced that it's positivity that we need in our lives and a tradition that we can establish together. There was no way that I could deny him of this, especially when I feel like I can't give him everything that he deserves in our relationship, despite how hard that I try.

I give Peeta a smile, examining the tall pine before me, nodding my head in approval. “It looks great, Peeta. Now we're supposed to decorate it, right?”

Peeta nods at me, the grin not leaving his lips. Peeta wanted to put the tree up weeks ago, but I refused. I was being grumpy about the whole thing for awhile. I told him that we couldn't put it up until Christmas Eve, but now, seeing how happy that it's making him to get to do this, I feel bad for being such a grouch about it. It's obviously very important to Peeta that we do this and I should be more supportive of it.

“Yeah. I talked to Effie and she sent us some lights and some ornaments and I think a star that we can put on the top of it. I figured it'd be easier to do it this way this year, and then maybe next year we can make out own decorations. That's what me and my brothers used to do.”

I perk up a little more when I hear Peeta bring up his family. The memories of his family are usually really fuzzy and it's rare that one will pop up, but something about Christmas and decorating the tree must have brought it out of him. I'm happy when Peeta is able to remember things on his own and I'm always eager to learn more about his life before the Games, before me. “You did?” I ask, hoping up from my spot on the couch and walking over the small stack of boxes that Effie had apparently shipped for us, pulling back the tape and opening up the flaps to see bright, sparkly orbs staring back at me.

“Yeah, we did. We used to make ornaments out of pine cones and string and we used yarn to make tinsel,” Peeta says, smiling at the memory, much to my relief. “We never did the thing where we strung up popcorn or berries. We didn't want to waste the food.”

I set the box with all of the ornaments aside, opening up the second box to see a few boxes of lights, some white some multicolored. I don't want too many colors, so I take out the boxes of white lights, trying to get more involved, trying to get in the spirit of this for Peeta's sake. Really, it could be fun, could be positive so I'm trying. Especially now that this is bringing out memories of his family, happy memories of his family. So far so good. I can only hope that nothing goes wrong. “That sounds nice. We never celebrated Christmas. Except one year. I bought...I bought Prim a gift with some extra game I'd managed to catch. So technically, this is my first Christmas.”

Peeta smiles at this and comes over to where I'm at, helping me to take the strings of lights from the small boxes. “Well, I'm honored that you've chosen to spend your first Christmas with me,” he teases, traveling back over to the tree with a sting of lights in hand. I watch as he seems to skillfully tuck the lights into the tree, wrapping them delicately across the branches. I wonder if I'll be able to to the same or if mine will look sloppy. I want to make this as perfect as possible. Peeta's right. We don't have a lot of positives and Dr. Aurelius is always telling us that in order to move past all of the traumas that we've been through, in order to get better we have to start making happy memories and while we have done that to some degree, I feel like maybe Peeta's right about this whole Christmas thing, it will be something that we can use to make happy memories every year, not just once. It's something that we can look forward to doing together and not something spur of the moment. It will be something else to add to our routine, to add a sense of normalcy to our far from normal life.

I take a string of lights over to the tree, placing them in the section above the one that Peeta was just working on, mimicking his actions from a few moments before. “Is this right?”

Peeta let's out a chuckle and I scowl. If I was doing it wrong, he just has to say so, not laugh at me, but he goes on to speak. “Don't worry so much about doing this whole things right. There' s no right or wrong way. We can do it our way.”

“But don't we want the tree to look good?” I ask him, thinking of the beautifully decorated tree that I used to see through the windows of the Undersee house when I'd go there to visit Madge or the trade with the mayor.

“I really don't care what the tree looks like, Katniss. I'm just glad that you agreed to do this with me,” he says, that grin not leaving his lips. He seems to pleased with everything that's happening that I can hardly continue to be grumpy about this whole Christmas thing. I think that seeing him smile is enough to make it worth it, as cheesy as that sounds.

“Well, I couldn't really say no,” I mumble, continuing to stuff the lights into the branches of the tree, taking in the smell of the pine needles as I do. It reminds me of being in the woods for a moment, somewhere I haven't been able to go in almost a week thanks the hideous weather we've been having. Having a real tree was one of my conditions for doing this whole Christmas thing. Since I had been so insistent on putting off the celebration until last minute, we almost didn't get to have a tree because the snow and ice was too bad to go into the woods and risk trudging the hills and the rocks. Thankfully, someone in Twelve had the bright idea of selling trees down near where the Hob used to be. Peeta and I had found a decent one down there. In a way, it was better than going into the woods and getting one for ourselves because this way, we helped someone out who obviously needed the money.

“Well, technically you could've said no, but I don't think you wanted to,” he says, digging into the other boxes and pulling out the boxes of sparkling orbs in nearly every color imaginable. “Did Effie really have to send us these in every color of the rainbow?”

I let out a laugh as I step onto my tiptoes to attempt to tuck the last of the lights into the highest of the branches. “Effie deems is necessary for everything to be in every color of the rainbow.”

Peeta comes up behind me and take the string of lights gently from my hands, giving me a look that simply says “let me”. I allow him to do so, even though I really wanted to be able to do it myself. Peeta likes to do things for me. It was hard, at first, to allow him to do anything for me. I'm so used to being independent and doing almost everything there is to do on my own and it was hard for me to ever let anybody do anything for me, but before Peeta came back, I was completely reliant on Greasy Sae for everything because I was unwilling to budge from my bed. I decided once Peeta came back, I was never going to be that codependent again. Then I discovered that Peeta likes to do things, not just for me, but for other people. It's just the kind of person that he is, and I'm happy to see some of the old Peeta, the pre-hijacking Peeta, come through. So I learned to deal with letting him do simple things for me without complaining. Such as reaching something that I can't, or making me a cup of tea when I'm sick of having one of those days that I can't make myself get out of the bed. Those things aren't so bad and I've learned to appreciate them rather than to resent them.

We decorate the rest of tree in mostly silence. I'll ask a questions occasionally and he'll provide an answer, but the conversation doesn't go further than that and before I know it, the tree is a sparkling mass of glowing lights and shining orbs. After we're done, we settle in on the couch, the fire crackling in the fireplace, and a mug of hot coca that Peeta's added a touch of peppermint to. The tree looks lovely sitting by the window with all of it's decorations, and tomorrow, Haymitch and Effie are coming over for dinner. Maybe this whole Christmas thing isn't so bad after all.

“Katniss?” Peeta's voice breaks the comfortable silence that we've been sitting for a long while and I break my eyes away from the fire to glance back over at him.

“Yeah? What is it?”

“Now, I know you said no presents...” Peeta starts.

“Peeta, you didn't!” I say as suddenly the feeling of icy cold guilt makes its way through out my body because I obviously didn't get him anything.

“I did, but in all honesty, it's not really a Christmas present. I meant to give this to you before Christmas but then you agreed to celebrate Christmas so it seemed like the perfect time to give it to you,” Peeta says, his blue eyes never once leaving mine the entire time that he speaks.

“But Peeta, now I feel bad,” I mumble, my own gaze turning down towards the floor. “I didn't get you anything.”

Peeta's fingers come underneath my chin, tilting it upwards so I'm forced to look at him again. “I don't care that you didn't get my anything. I was going to wait until after Christmas, but now that you told me that this is your first Christmas, I wanted to make it special. I couldn't let that pass without you getting a present.”

I feel my features soften and my heart flutter inside of my chest. I was about to get mad, I was about to tell him that I regretted this entire Christmas thing entirely but how could I? Especially not when this is my Peeta shining through. This is the Peeta that I fell in love with. This is my Peeta and I wouldn't trade moments where he's like this for anything. These moments where he is genuinely himself are still so rare, I have to grab and live in the moments when they exist.

I can see the nervousness etching it's way onto Peeta's face as I don't say anything. “You're not mad, are you?” he asks, his usually steady voice shaking just a little.

I shake my head, leaning over to sit my mug down on the coffee table. “No. I'm not mad. I really can't be when you put it like that,” I mumble in reply, doing my best to avoid meeting his eyes again. I sit back against the couch, glancing over at him. “I guess let's get this over with. What did you get me that wasn't really for Christmas?”

Peeta gives me his signature sheepish smile before digging his hand into his jacket pocket and retrieving a small box. I'm confused. I know it's not an engagement ring, we're already married, but from what I know, I know for sure that what Peeta has grasped in his hand is a ring box. I don't say anything though. I simply hold my hand out to take it when he extends his hand to me.

“Open it,” he simply says, his blue eyes focused on my, his knee jiggling as he bounces his foot off of the floor, apparently anxious to see my reaction to whatever is in the box.

I do as he says, taking the box in my hands and prying the tiny box open with my fingers and when I do I'm met with an unexpected it sight. It's a ring, like I thought it would be, but instead of it being a diamond like I thought Peeta might have gotten, it's not. Instead, staring back at me is my pearl, the one that I've kept ever since Peeta gave it to me in the arena, the small, smooth pearl that he found, the thing that gave me hope when Peeta was in the Capitol, the only piece of Peeta that I had always had with me. I thought it was secure in the draw of my nightstand beside the bed, but obviously Peeta had done some snooping around and found it himself. Peeta has had it made into a ring and I couldn't be happier. Now I can keep it with me at all times and not be afraid that I'll lose it, that it will fall out of my pocket and I'll never see it again. It doesn't have to hide in darkened drawer inside of our room.

I don't know what to say and I think it's making Peeta nervous because before I know it, he starts rambling. “Is this okay? I mean, I remember you telling me how much that the pearl meant to you and I didn't get you a ring at our toasting and I wanted you to have one, and this seemed like a way better idea than a diamond. I hope you don't-”

But he never gets to finish his sentence because I lean forward and capture his lips with a kiss pulling away after a minute to give him a smile. I'm not the best with words, but I don't think that I need that many to let him know how much this means to me. “Peeta, I love it. Thank you so much. Thank you for making my first Christmas special.”

A smile spreads across his face as he mutters one thing. “Merry Christmas, Katniss.”

“Merry Christmas, Peeta,” I respond and our lips meet again and once more I'm reminded why Peeta was always the right one, how I somehow always knew that it was him I would spend my life with. He makes things good again. While we're a long way away from being normal or being happy most of the time, it's nights like these that remind me that things can be good again, that they will be and all because of Peeta. I look forward to spending every Christmas for the rest of my life with him, making happy memories like these to make up for all of the bad ones.  


End file.
